ABE 5707C
Agricultural Waste Management
Notable
Quotes and Stories
"Law of Probable Dispersal" Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed. "Heller's Law" The first myth of management is that it exists. Subject: The Salesman A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day,
only to be "If I could take a
couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the
very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners. "Don't be too
hasty!" he said. Subject: Grocery store
shopping The new supermarket near our house has an
automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it
goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
Quotes from “Poop
Scoop”, North Florida Research and Great Truths About Life
confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
"Good morning," said the young man.
"Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any
money!" and she proceeded to close the door.
Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it
wide open.
"Not until you have at least seen my demonstration." And with
that, he emptied a bucket of horse
manure onto her hallway carpet.
"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse
manure from your carpet, Madam, I
will personally eat the remainder."
The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you've got a good
appetite, because they
cut off my electricity this morning."
When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and witness the
scent of fresh hay.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and
the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.
The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn.
I dont buy toilet paper there any more...